Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
