i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Randomize
