he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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