Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Randomize