i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize