dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
