I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
