glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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