is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize