But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Will you blow on my dice?
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
