Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize