the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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