Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
