there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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