i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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