i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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