She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
