he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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