She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
