i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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