Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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