On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize