why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
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