A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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