He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize