i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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