Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
