Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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