i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
