I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
