so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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