So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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