There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
i believe in u and ur pee
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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