I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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