he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
