Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
