found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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