Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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