Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
