I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I wish I only lived at night.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
