Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Randomize
