Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
