foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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