What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
