oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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