there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
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