Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
