Just cropdusted the office
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Be still, my beating vagina.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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