Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Randomize
