They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
